why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
