so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
