like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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