WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
She's the barista slut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
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