anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
