Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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