I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
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