I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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