Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
not ubering you a puppy
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
