whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
