he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
My butt remains clenched, sir.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
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