they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
