We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
