I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Randomize