idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Randomize
