i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
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i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
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Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
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