so that wasnt chicken after all
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Randomize
