Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
