Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Randomize
