today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
