It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
