The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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