chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
