We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
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