i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize
