Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
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