Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Randomize
