After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
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