i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
