I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
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