i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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