i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Randomize
