that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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