I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
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