She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Randomize
