He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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