He kissed a someone with a penis
17 year olds will be the death of me.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
try to milk me bitch
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