By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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