Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So much rum. So many feels.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
Randomize