the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
