Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
