Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
My penis needs a shock collar
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
