Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
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