Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Randomize