FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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