New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
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