dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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