I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Randomize
