remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize