I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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