Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
