The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
vagina is talking i cant
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
organizing the empties. That sober.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
