i think i have herpe
just one?
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize